Since my recent return to the blogosphere, many of you have written in asking me about my new job and what I am doing all day. (At least, you know, in my imagination.)

Well, today, for example, I have been digesting various articles and reports so our sales people don't have to. You know, sort of like those people who pre-chew food for the elderly.

Anyway, I came across something which I had to share. It's from a PowerPoint presentation comparing newspapers and outdoor advertising.

In particular, the section contrasting the Minneapolis StarTribue of today to the one from 1997 — widely-regarded as golden age of print journalism.

Let's begin, shall we?

Average number of teasers per day
Then: 5
Now: 9.2

Personally, I'm not sure what a teaser is.

Average amount of copy above the fold
Then: 9.2 paragraphs
Now: 5.8 paragraphs

Uh ... that makes 'em easier to read, doesn't it?

Number of headlines phrased as a question
Then: 2
Now: 15

Well, there have been tremendous advances in headline technology in the last decade. Besides, if you don't like headlines phrased as a question, you can always read NUVO.

Total number of national news stories
Then: 17
Now: 6

So? The standard complainant is that there's no good local or international journalism anymore.

Total number of shopping/consumer-related stories
Then: 1
Now: 10

As a reader, I'm inclined to agree that this is a bad thing. (Cough, cough INTAKE! cough, cough.) But this PowerPoint is aimed at advertisers, right? Well, they love that kind of thing!

Total references to dogs or children
Then: 0
Now: 11

'Nuff said!

Total references to death or violence
Then: 5
Now: 10 (number related to the war in Iraq: 0)

I'm detecting a bit of liberal bias here ...

Biggest story
Then: Mass suicide of 39 California cult members
Now: Dog attack in Minneapolis

I tried to warn the Minneapolis StarTribune that if they caused all the cult members to commit suicide they might not have anything to write about later!

Number of days a photo obscures newspaper's name
Then: 0
Now: 4 out of 5

I don't have anything funny to say about this one. Although, obviously, I haven't let that stop me before.

Percentage of those photos that are dogs, babies, celebrities, or models
100

I think this lady is prejudiced against dogs and babies.

Number of photos featuring attractive young women
Then: 0
Now: 6

And the problem with this is ... ?

Number of photos of dangerous men
Then: 2
Now: 2

So it's a wash. But the real question is — would I qualify as a dangerous man? (It's okay, you don't need to answer.)

Uses of the word "you" or "your"
Then: 0
Now: 9

No comment.

Uses of the phrase "sexy and confident at Mystic Lake"
Then: 0
Now: 1 (in reference to singer Taylor Hicks)

OK, she is really reaching now.

Global Warming Index
Then: High Temp 55
Now: High Temp 75

Definitely liberal.

Price
Then: 50 Cents
Now: 50 Cents

Wow, great closer! So let me get this straight ... I get more dogs, babies and attractive young women for the same price? Thanks, Minneapolis StarTribune!

Here's a cool article from the Boston Globe on the typefaces used by the various presidential campaigns.

Worth noting:

If we were to predict the results based on typography and design, we would pick McCain and Obama.

Well, looks like John McCain blew away the competition in Florida and is poised to take the Republican nomination. This just goes to show, never give up — never surrender.

Meanwhile, on the other side of things, Barack Obama is picking up some pretty big endorsements and inspiring people coast-to-coast.

Things are starting to get really interesting ...

Ugh! Another one of the benefits — or drawbacks — of this new job is that I am within lunching distance of a Cici's Pizza where they are more than happy to bring you an entire pepperoni deep dish pizza after you have already consumed a salad and four to five slices of regular pizza.

Today, I am blogging from the Dual 2 Ghz PowerPC G5 Mac with 2 GB of RAM with the sweet 23" Apple Cinema HD flat panel that I use at my new job. I point this out because about three years ago I was so ecstatic about having access to a wimpy eMac with — shudder — 128 MB or RAM that I wrote:

Those of you who know what an elitist poseur I am will understand how thrilling that alone is for me.

... more assured of their superiority, less modest and more open than the general population.

What sucks is being so ecstatic to discover in one's mailbox a magazine promising Sarah Silverman's editorial touch — a concept that made one originally think of titling one's blog entry about the discovery "More proof for God's existence" — only to find a mere three pages of Sarah content: two pictures and one pointless mini-interview. Oi vey!

Regular readers of this blog might remember my joy during the 2004 election cycle.

On a personal level, it featured a genuine longing for real change in America, vacillation and uncertainty about which candidate was right for me, an eventual bold (and completely wrong) prediction of a Kerry "landslide", an account of my disenfranchisement and, at last, a sort of pledge of support for George W. Bush:

Prior to pledging my support for Mr. Bush, here's what I had to say about the Democrats:

The Democrats are dead. The party has been decimated. The Republicans are more organized, more focued, and much, much better at running campagins. I'm not sure Barack Obama will be able to pick up the peices, but it's a start. We need a house cleaning.

Now, here we are, a little over three years later and it looks like Barack Obama — a guy who also has a genuine longing for real change in America — is trying to do just that. Alas, he's being undercut by the establishment of his own party which is using fear of idealism (and black people) to positioning Hillary Clinton as a "practical" choice for Democrats.

Meanwhile, on the Republican side, we've got a massive number of individuals trying to get religious literalists like Mitt Romney and Mike Huckabee pushed to the top of the ticket because a true idealist like John McCain threatens their in-group/out-group worldview.

Personally, what I'd like to see is an Obama/McCain general election. These are two guys who have passionate, personal, heart-felt visions for America ... and I feel like we would all benefit from those competing visions civilly but wholeheartedly pleading with America. But what'll probably happen is a Clinton/Romney contest ... and I get the feeling that if that happens, Romney comes out on top.